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雅思小作文批改题目是雅思4的test1的小作文,这篇作文怎么样,大概能得多少分啊,The chart demostrat

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雅思小作文批改
题目是雅思4的test1的小作文,这篇作文怎么样,大概能得多少分啊,
The chart demostrates the percentage of different types of families living poor in Australia in 1999.
According to the chart,the family of aged couple,accouts least pecentage around 4%.While the single aged family and the couple who have not children are similiar,roughly 6%and 7% .All of them are lower than the everage--11%.However,the family of sole parent,have the highest proportion,nearly 21%.And the family which is single person without children is followed,about 19%.Besides,the poverty in the couple with children accouts 12%---closing to the everage.
At the same time,it can be concluded that the population of poor varies from type to type.For example,the family which is aged couple,has the least number about 48,000.
And 54,000 in the single aged person family are living under the standard.Conversely,the family of couple with children,has a numroues number,around 933,000-about 20times of the least one.
At last,the family of sole parent is more likely to be poor.But the family of couple with children are the greatest number.
雅思小作文批改题目是雅思4的test1的小作文,这篇作文怎么样,大概能得多少分啊,The chart demostrat
比例从小到大这种书写方式实际上不那么容易与后面的data analysis衔接,但雅思小作文要求没那么高.因此,只要有点把握,这么写只要不乱就没有太大的问题哦.根据官方给出的雅思小作文的marking criteria,我给出的分数是这样的:
task achievement——6分,整体感很不错,但对于资料显示的问题缺乏突出的分析,因此这方面还有进步的空间.
coherence & cohesion——5分,议论文并不意味着没有高低起伏.相反的,分析的层次有一定的变化,才能够让需要表达的方方面面依照一定的规则紧密的联系在一起.
lexical resource——5分,这类文章的用词实际上可以更精准,问题是我们国家的同学没接受过相关的正规训练.
grammatical range & accuracy——6分,语法错误还是能见到,但不多,这里主要是组句方式反映出的语言习惯的问题,和用词的灵活度的问题.
综合以上四项,这篇小作文的得分是5.5分.